Wind
Beneath My Wings
It must have been hard to be the Speaker
Of '94's rabid right wing class
'Cause if you had a search light and a mirror... in both hands
You couldn't find your own fat ass
(And I admire that)
Remember when you shut down the government?
(Remember that one, Newt?)
Because you were snubbed on Air Force One?
(That was great)
But your brilliant plan - it had a glitch... (yes it did)
And Bill Clinton f---ed you like a bitch
Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I aspire to be? (Yes, you are)
You are a goofy looking dickhead (Just like me, Newt)
And you are the wind beneath my wings
(Don't go, Newt. Bob Livingston's a pussy compared to you.)
Though you're corrupt and you're a liar
On Capitol Hill, you won't be missed
It won't be long until you're back getting rich
Turning tricks as a lobbyist
Did you ever know that Newt's my hero?
He's everything I aspire to be?
He's history's most successful failure
And Newt is the wind beneath my wings
Newt is the wind beneath my wings
(God bless you, Newt. We love you. Bye-bye.)