Dubya's Candid Sonnet (the public confession he'll never make) By Randall Winn

When in disgrace from my dorm room I stumbled,
Refusing to tell who supplied me with coke,
And, dodging the draft, to the air guard I bumbled
And flew very little, due to drink and to smoke,
Wishing I were in business, with daddy's name possessed,
By Poppy's pals supported whene'er I went broke,
Whole companies ruined where ever I messed,
My Master's of Business seemed only a joke,

When in this haze, with Harken fast fading,
Happily I thought of this: insider trading!
Then taxpayers, like to Enron's bubble a-rising,
A stadium builded for me – most surprising!
The laugh of the world, our nation's chief resident,
I prove that anyone can grow up to be pResident!